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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28372431">as the world comes to an end</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/nextstopparis/pseuds/nextstopparis'>nextstopparis</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>merthur week [7]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Merlin (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Episode Related, Episode: s05e13 The Diamond of the Day, Established Relationship, M/M, Magic Revealed, idk wtf this is omg</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 23:46:43</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>444</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28372431</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/nextstopparis/pseuds/nextstopparis</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>surely, this look is not one shared between lovers, but between monsters and men.</p><p>For Day 7 of Merthur Week 2020: Free Day + Magic Reveal</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>merthur week [7]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2067786</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Merthur Week 2020</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>as the world comes to an end</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>what do you want me to say? idk what this is!!!!!!!!</p><p>title from King and Lionheart by Of Monsters and Men</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>1.</p><p>he clutches his king’s forearm, squeezes the back of his king’s hand, and prays to soon feel the weight of it.</p><p>it feels too light to be real. </p><p>2.</p><p>he traces a dragon with the golden embers of the fire and hopes his king understands the promise behind the gesture.</p><p>even if he does, it is not enough.</p><p>3.</p><p>the confession comes as a cry; a plea for forgiveness. </p><p>he used to wonder why it had to be a confession at all — why he had to lay himself bare, inside out, like he was nothing more and nothing less than another sin. he used to stare up at the clear sky and ask, scared and angry and confused, why power would be given like this if all it does is make a monster. what the point of it all is. </p><p>now he stares down at blue eyes that are no less clear and no more forgiving, and feels the monstrosity he was always destined to become take over him completely.</p><p>this betrayed and wounded look — this fear — surely it’s not meant for people, but for wretched things. </p><p>surely, this look is not one shared between lovers, but between monsters and men. </p><p>surely, this look is everything he has always feared, confirmed.</p><p>4.</p><p>talking is a lot harder when there are things to be said. </p><p>it starts and ends with betrayal, and he doesn’t think it will ever be anything else.</p><p>(magic, he thinks, is just an easy out—something to blame that doesn’t make it so personal and terrifying.)</p><p>they talk in circles, but with every conversation leading back to the beginning, he thinks there appears another crack in the cycle. maybe it will not be impossible to end anew.</p><p>5.</p><p>arthur’s body grows heavier, and merlin cries, each night his king’s eyes flutter shut, at the irony of it all. for him to feel more solid than ever, even as he fades</p><p>(and he is — fading, that is).</p><p>he kisses the kings lips and rests cheek against cheek all to feel the stuttering, weakening, light but <em> still there </em> breath.</p><p>6.</p><p>the gaze on him softens, like iron turning into air. </p><p>it’s forgiveness without the actual words, and he feels them heal even as arthur does not; even as arthur bleeds.</p><p>bleeds and bleeds and bleeds and doesn’t stop. </p><p>7. </p><p>he should’ve been the one to apologize. </p><p>8.</p><p>arthur’s final request is not one made by a king, but one made by a dying lover. he asks, in his final moments, to be held. </p><p>so merlin does, as close and gently as he can, and wonders how he will ever let him go.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>i????? if u figure what this was lmk??? i hope u enjoyed???? !!!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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